My WHY

As I sit here, write this and tell you MY WHY, I am crying, not because I am sad, but because I am happy. I want you to think to yourself when reading this what your WHY is. Because when you find your WHY, you find everything in your power to fight for that WHY, you do what others can’t because your WHY is so strong. You live and breath for that WHY. So here it goes..

This is my WHY. My darling daughter, Trinity. She has given me the most amazing experiences at life that anyone could ever imagine. Before she was born, I heard her heart beat, I felt her kicks, and I felt her move all around in my belly. It was mind blowing. I was going to care and nurture a new human being and hell, I didn’t know what to do. But that is what happens, you learn how to take care of that blessing. You do everything you can to take care of that precious jewel that was given to you. You ask questions, you read the internet, you go above everything else and give that baby everything that you can possibly think of. You do all of this because that blessing is your heart, your soul, your everything and your WHY!

My WHY is growing fast and she is learning that Mommy isn’t around enough. She is seeing Mommy work Monday through Sunday, then come home and work some more because it’s what she has to do. She works really hard to make sure her WHY lives the best life. It’s not about the money, it’s not about the mansion, it’s not about a fancy car, it’s about TIME. Time with my WHY, time with her so she can learn, time with her to see her laugh, smile and have fun. Time with her to show her that life is precious and we need to live every minute of it. I am sacrificing my time, my energy, my happiness just so my WHY can see that Mommy will give her the world. My WHY will not have a broken home. My WHY will not have to cry herself to sleep because she isn’t with her Mommy. My WHY will not have to move every other month. My WHY will not have to stay up at night and wonder what tomorrow will be like. My WHY will not be ashamed of herself.

BUT my WHY will have structure. My WHY will have a home to live in. MY why will have her parents to take care of her. My WHY will have good food on the table. My WHY will have a heart full of love. My WHY will have a big smile on her face, always. My WHY will have the best life she can possibly have because her Mommy and Daddy work hard to give her that. We only have this one life, and we need to treasure it. Some of us are blessed with our WHY including myself, some of us don’t know what are WHY is, and some of us don’t even think about our WHY. When your WHY is so big though, you sacrifice now that way you don’t have to wish you started a long time ago. Working 4 jobs won’t last long because I am building a life of freedom for my WHY. My WHY will have her Mommy home, have weekends with her Mommy and have TIME with her Mommy every day here soon.

When you figure out your WHY though, you figure out why your life is worth living. Why you want to make your dreams become reality, why you work your ass off, why you strive to be better, why you go above and beyond to get things done, why you fight so hard, why you have sleepless nights, why you are brave and fearless. Seriously, think about your WHY. When it brings tears to your eyes, you know that it’s your WHY. When you find your WHY, don't ever give up on it.

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